Help for Healing

Bitter & Sweet, living daily with grief


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Yearly Physical

I have my yearly physical in two days and I’m dreading it. Let’s see…

I had foot surgery seven months ago and my foot pain is worse than ever. It’s taken this long to end up in a situation where I have an appointment with a second surgeon who is probably going to tell me I need a second surgery. That’s ok, but frankly it should have been last December. Seven months of nonsense and chronic pain.

I do want to pick her brain about the latest treatment the FDA just released in February for chronic, refractory depression. It made sense to me to wean off all the meds I take for that so I can develop a baseline. I’m doing it properly- very slowly over time. I already see a difference though. There’s an increase in crying and a decrease in tolerance for stress. Not a surprise, but I wish I had something happier to report.

My guess is I’ve also gained twenty pounds since last year and believe me, you can tell. I’ve weaned myself off my supplements to get a better baseline for that as well. I was intending to eat more healthy and get off the pre-diabetic status. I’m going to plead with her not to even test my blood. I’ve gone the opposite direction. I can’t even imagine what my levels are like, but my weight is an indication of what it would show.

Sigh.

I’m hoping that Tim has off work though so he can go and meet my doc. She will be thrilled about that. Last year we had fingers crossed that he was going to stick around and continue to be who he seemed to be. That is the one bright spot I will be happy to report on. He treats me like a queen!

Future blogs will probably discuss the new treatment out there when I have enough information to write an educated paragraph or two. In the meantime, I will just keep hoping to somehow make some progress on these long-term issues I have. Gotta love the aging process!


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The Mighty Dollar

I hate to be cynical but…

We have laws/legislature that supposedly protects people. While that might be true, there is no doubt in my mind that a big factor (perhaps the biggest factor?) comes down to money. Almost always does.

I was at a big conference in Albany this week where we were talking about some of these issues. The example I used was my dad. I know there are assisted living facilities that don’t have nurses on staff. However, his did. Not allowing his family to provide medication was undoubtedly for money, not for his protection. How do I know? The literal first words out of their mouths at our meeting were: Now that your dad can no longer take his own medication, you need to pay our medical staff to do so. Let’s see, that is $750 more a month.

Bite me.

Yesterday, I finally got a second opinion on my foot. After 5 1/2 months of post-surgery pain, I am now told I need a nerve shot. (Ouch!) Why can’t I get it while I am already here? You guessed it, money.

DAMN THEM. Insurance won’t pay for two appointments on the same day at the same facility. I have to live in pain for another 24 hours then return to the exact same place to get the treatment I need. How is that is any way, shape or form for the benefit of the patient? If they aren’t going to get paid, they aren’t going to do it. Why shouldn’t they get paid? And why should I be in pain for a longer period of time for no good reason? No common sense. I’m right in the office but get sent home untreated.

Ticks me off. Broken systems again. Makes me sound like a broken record.

Anyway, got the shot today. We will see what happens. The opinion is though, that most likely problems will come back and I will need a second surgery. Guess what? That’s what dumb ‘ol me said four months ago. Five months of PT twice a week, all kinds of contraptions and creams that cost money, and consistent pain with no relief. For what? To end up in the same place. At least I could have had the second surgery back in December and already been recovered by now.

Sigh.

Imperfect world. Thanks for listening to the rant.