Help for Healing

Bitter & Sweet, living daily with grief


Common Sense… A Lost Art?

I really don’t want my signature blog to be about complaints. And yet the things that motivate me to write lately, seem to be about things that irritate me. Do you have any stories you want to add? Here are some of mine from the last 24 hours.

Last night I went to my favorite karaoke place. I don’t get to go much anymore but I used to be a weekly regular. I was saying to someone that I wasn’t too thrilled with the bartender. The last time I was in the there he was friendly and fun. Yesterday he acted like he didn’t even know who I was. Just gave me a bad feeling. But the kicker was the end of the night. Bottom line, my bill was a whole $7.50. I gave him $22 and asked him if he could bring me a ten back. Now, that is about a 70% tip. 70%!! He came back with a five and five dollar bills. Waiters do that all the time. We know why they do it- they are expecting a tip and want you to have change to do it. I don’t really have a problem with that. I actually almost count on it sometimes.

But after I already gave him a 70% tip? I was incredulous. I thought maybe he misunderstood or didn’t know what the bill was. I asked him if he got the tip I already gave him and he just said yes and stared at me. I couldn’t believe it. I was disgusted. He gave me crappy service to begin with, I over-tipped him anyway in light of the Christmas spirit, and then he had the balls to imply he wanted more. I cussed all the way home.

Today started out great as well. I’ve already mentioned I’m burning the candle at both ends so I don’t appreciate a bunch of nonsense added to an already daunting list. Frankie’s bus came over 30 minutes late this morning. The roads were pretty bad. I got a call from the school later that said Frankie was absent from school. If you are a parent, you know what that does to your heart. I called administration and politely but firmly asked them if they thought their policy made sense to take attendance before their buses even arrived. She thought that was probably a bad idea and patched me through to the proper school office.

The next woman I talked to was brilliant. I asked her the same question and I was told they extended homeroom but took attendance anyway. Frankie’s teacher called the office later and said he was at school so he had already been marked “present” (like that was the important part). I still suggested that perhaps they should indefinitely postpone attendance- or at the very least- postpone calling parents and alarming them until after all the buses had arrived. It was great that they changed their sheet of paper, but did it not occur to them to call back the parents they had called prematurely and apologize for their mistake? Her response was to ignore me so I hung up on her.

Really. How about some common sense?

Reminds me of a few of the chapters in my second book when I talk about some of the craziness I had to deal with, with different agencies after Tim died. By the way, it got released this week!! Check it out when you get a chance. It’s called “Life After Death, On This Side of Heaven.”

Anyhow, I never used to get mad about stuff. Or if I did, I just made the best of it. Now I verbalize my responses. Some would say, “Good for you.” If you are that special guy in my life, you would even say, “You’re welcome” because he has taught me the benefits of anger and sticking up for myself… lol. But I’m sure lots of people would tell me to chill out (no pun intended). Feel free to comment, but beware. If you fall in the latter category, you might just get a call from me :). Just kidding… (sorta).


Snow and Sports

How ironic that last week my son “blogged” about the importance of football. Today I am going to blog about how ridiculous it is that sports carry as much importance as they do.

First, let me say that we are in West Seneca and are in the eye of the latest snow storm. A picture is worth a thousand words. 20141119_084220

That is my backyard. The fence is about five feet and the snow is almost at the top. Here is another one.20141118_084421

That little black dot is the mirror of our car. We are still not dug out from that. And if the outside perils aren’t enough to deal with, this is my favorite picture of all.20141119_082508

That, my friends, is my kitchen ceiling. The bathroom, basement and upstairs bedroom also have water damage.

My neighbor across the street has been laid up for five weeks after knee surgery. Two houses down, my neighbor is very sick with his third bout of cancer. And about 10 minutes away, my daughter-in-law is on bed rest with a high-risk pregnancy. She has been hospitalized several times. I am praying my heart out that nothing happens while she is unable to get to an emergency room if needed. I will take my problems any day.

But what is my point?

Tuesday, the Sabres decided not to cancel their game. I guess the show must go on. They put a sentence or two on their website telling fans to respect the driving bans in their neighborhood. I thought it was a poor decision, but didn’t dwell on it.

But then yesterday, I heard the Bills were offering to pay people to shovel their stadium for the game on Sunday. I went ballistic. What the hell is wrong with the priorities of our society? There is a damn driving ban in Orchard Park (where the stadium is). Are they kidding? How about they get people together to help dig out the people who are stranded? Especially those with medical issues! The football stadium? They are ticketing people out on the roads. I AM TOTALLY DISGUSTED.

Now I will really go out on a limb here and risk pissing people off. I’m pretty liberally minded, but how about some common sense? How about using the prison inmates to do some shoveling? Or even some welfare and unemployed folks who are physically able to work? There are so many areas that have zero snow, or barely a dusting. So let’s gather them and help each other out. But not to shovel out the stadium. Let’s get our priorities straight people!

Ok, I am going back to my shovel now… lol. Really not trying to offend anyone, but some things just have to be said.